The Secret of Getting Along // Positively Speaking // Mark Wilson

lion and lamb

Some people have an extra hard time getting along with people. Wherever they go, they leave a trail of broken relationships, disappointments, and a heap of “former” friends.

An individual may be highly intelligent, a hard worker, willing to go the “extra mile”, committed to excellence — and still fail because of relationship problems.

I’ve often wondered, how do these folks sabotage themselves? Is this just the way they’re wired or can they do something about it?

Although we are born with certain personality traits which make us more or less people-oriented, I firmly believe than anyone can get along with just about anybody if they follow a few basic relationship rules:

1) Focus on the positive. You will find plenty of negative things about people if you look for them. Instead, go mining for the positive, and you will find that too!

2) Never go fishing with a crab apple for bait. If you want people to be friendly to you, you have to be friendly to them. You can’t expect to keep many friends if you are a grouch. (Negative people do keep some friends — negative ones. Misery loves company.)

3) Follow the 101% principle. Find the 1% you have in common and give 100% effort to it.

4) Don’t impute motives. It’s easy for us to jump to conclusions — “He did that because he doesn’t like me.” Try to believe that the other person had good intentions.

5) Be willing to forgive. Don’t let your irritations and frustrations stockpile into a mountain of bitterness. It’s best to deal with it and then let it go.

6) Believe in other people. Remember that we are all created in the image of God. Each person you meet is a VIP! Never consider yourself “better” than others.

7) Follow the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

8) Be genuinely interested in others. Focus on them instead of yourself. Self-absorption is a certain path to unhappiness.

9) Determine that you will be an encourager and a positive influence on each person you meet.

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